Proverbs 4:23 says, “Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.”
Wellspring is defined as:
1.) The source of a spring or stream
2.) A source of continual or abundant supply
Every thing in your life comes from your heart. It is the source of our life. Wow.
The heart manifests itself in many ways. It can be in the form of jealousy, bitterness, anger, and how we conduct ourselves each day.
What is wrong with my heart?
My husband and I have been blessed abundantly and the Lord has grown us each day, especially my husband. I have seen him pursue the Lord with passion and obedience and I have seen him pray for people each day. I see how he handles situations the way the Lord would want him to conduct himself. And I witness how he runs his youth ministry with great hope and love for these students to really know the Lord and His heart towards them. I love being his wife. I love seeing what he is like 24/7. No one else knows him like I do, except for the Lord. There have been many times when I witness something that Paul does and it causes me to repent or it causes me to mimic his actions. Marriage is such a sweet union and I am so thankful that God chose me to witness Paul’s life.
But, great love can cause great passion, especially when faced with unpleasant situations. For many months I have felt pinned in a corner, left and right getting attacked with words or accusations. Even if they weren’t directed at me, I took them personally because Paul and I are one. Unfortunately, when pushed in the corner too much, you start to fight back because you have reached your limit, you say, “I am fed up! ” You start to push back or that anger and bitterness and offense start to intensify within you, within your heart.
Lately, I haven’t reigned in what has been taking place in my heart. Once you continue to feed your heart each day with anger, resentment, hurt, your life will start to act on those feelings.
Matthew 5:16 says, “If you do not forgive others their sin, your Father will not forgive your sins.”
Ouch.
All along I felt justified to feel how I felt and act in anger and hurt, because if anyone knew how wrong and ignorant they were, it would be me. I also thought that Jesus would see how justified I was and give me permission to set them straight and show them how wrong they were.
But I am not the one to step in and correct. I do not have that authority.
Matthew 5:16 doesn’t give you an option. It doesn’t say, “Robyn, you can forgive these people for this offense, but this other offense over here you can hold on to.”
Nope, Jesus means the whole thing.
All. Of. It.
Darnit.
John Piper says, “the solution is not to fix the other person. The solution is to gain a heart that is overflowingly thankful for grace from Christ and that spills over with grace towards others.” He also says, “Most of our bitterness and anger towards others is rooted in an inability to be profoundly amazed at Christ’s love for us in our sin.”
So,the message I need to take away today is, I need to guard my heart from bitterness, anger, offense, unforgiveness because I can’t live my life abundantly. Because with them I will not see Christs forgiveness towards me and my sin and they will inhibit my inability to forgive others and in turn Christ will not continue to forgive me.
Man, what a hard truth to live out, especially if you feel justified.
Jesus, please forgive me. And guide me towards forgiveness towards them.
